How can I make my divorce nasty, miserable and expensive?

There are a number of sure fire ways to make sure your divorce is nasty and expensive. In this post I will list a few strategies that will guarantee you and your spouse a miserable divorce.

Start dating right away

This is the most basic and most effective strategy. You will make your wife or husband feel betrayed and disrespected immediately. This will show them that you have moved on to someone else already.

The next best thing is to start dating right after the divorce is filed. This technique is sure to scuttle any thoughts your spouse may have had about a friendly, easy divorce.

If you want even more conflict, date several people!

Be sure to take your dates to places where your spouse will see you. Preferably to places where your spouse will be with his or her friends. You know, like her favorite restaurant for lunch with the girls. Or to the bar where your husband and his friends have a beer every Thursday after work.

If you have children, then you must remember to take your date to your kids’ ball game, play, or any school function that your spouse will attend.

These moves are guaranteed to create a hateful atmosphere that will make settlement nearly impossible. You and your spouse can then both lawyer up, and spend lots of time and money slinging dirt at each other.

Start dissing your spouse on Facebook

Post pictures of you and your date kissing and hugging on Facebook, where your spouse and your mutual friends will see them.

Get your friends and your spouse’s friends involved in your divorce on Facebook. You will both get lots of advice on how to get back at the the other. Their advice will usually differ from your lawyer’s advice. This will create problems between you and your lawyer, and it will help drive up your legal costs.

You can call your wife ugly, fat, a lousy cook, and a slut. Women can tell the world that their husband is stupid, a wimp, and in need of Viagra. Use lots of profanity.

Your lawyers will spend lots of time (and your money) reviewing and printing your posts, so they can use them at trial.

You and your spouse can also look forward to reading those posts on the witness stand, and saying all those ugly things in front of the Judge, and the other folks in the courtroom.

Get yourself a protection order

Getting a protection order during your divorce also helps makes things miserable and expensive.

You usually have to go to a different court to get a protection order. This creates a new case in a different court. You and your spouse will now pay attorneys to represent you in that case too.

Fortunately, once you get a protection order, you and your spouse can no longer talk to each other. All communications will have to go through your lawyers.

Getting your lawyers involved in every minor detail of your life is a terrific way to make your divorce expensive.

Finally, protection orders are often violated. These violations can then get both spouses criminal records. Sometimes even jail time!


Dating right away, dissing each other on Facebook, and getting a protection order will almost always guarantee a nasty, expensive and miserable divorce.

If that is what you want, then do all three. Your spouse will be just as miserable as you.

By Steve Harton